In case you can’t tell I love music! But I love music mainly because of the lyrics…so technically I love words! They touch me deep inside…in places no one and no thing can ever touch. At my church we love to sing the song “Cornerstone” by Hillsong.
This is is the anthem of my life these days and it goes like this:
My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness
I dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly trust in Jesus’ name.
Christ alone, cornerstone, weak made strong in the Savior’s love
through the storm He is Lord, Lord of all.
When darkness seems to hide His face, I rest on His unending grace
in every high and stormy gale my anchor holds within the veil.
It has been a few weeks since I miscarried and in that time I have been in this I’m ok/I’m not ok place. But to make things clear, I still trust God, I still love God — sometimes I get mad and yell and cry but He loves me and He understands that I am weak and He makes me strong. I find that although God understands my OUT OF WHACK MOOD SWINGS people don’t always and sometimes they just don’t know what to say. I find that people will either treat me like my life has ended or they treat me like nothing at all happened AND THE TRUTH IS I am neither of those — I am somewhere in between.
Sometimes darkness hides His face; sometimes it’s easy to find and hear Him. Right now things are hard (no baby and hospital bills galore) but when things are hard I simply rest on His strength which always sustains me.
I wanted to write about this because when I first started this blog I promised that I wouldn’t just talk about the good times but I would be candid about the hard times as well. And THINGS ARE HARD….right now….they won’t be forever but they are now. He is our cornerstone and right now He is bearing a lot of the weight.
Also AARON STRICKLAND you make me brave! I love you and wouldn’t want to live this life with anyone else — p.s. Look at that sweet face…it makes me melt!!